Oh reeally??? Patience grasshopper?!?
"I'm sorry!" I said. "If it was your womb that was about to be subleased for nine months, you'd want to know if you had a tenant too!"
I mean, this from a man who wants to know the origin of every bump, scrape or bruise that appears on his body the moment he spots it. Ha!
In any case, it looks like the wait is over. It appears I got my period this morning. It could be more spotting, but it seems to be the real deal. I must admit two things. One: I'm disappointed, which seems like a good sign, and two: I'm surprised. It really felt like something was happening down there. Part of me wonders if it wasn't another chemical thing similar to what happened in early June before we were officially trying. But no matter. If at first you don't succeed: screw, screw again!
So much of this experience, it seems, is going to boil down to simply wanting to affirm that my body works correctly. As a woman, you spend so much of life desperately afraid of getting pregnant at the wrong time, you take for granted the idea that it can happen at all.
On the other hand, if I were my uterus, I would probably be feeling pretty resentful myself right now. It's almost like she's a tiny woman within me thinking, "Oh, now you want me? You've taken me for granted all these years. Ignored me. Neglected me. Cursed me for cramps. Stifled my talents with oral contraceptives. And now you want me to go to work for you? Just like that? Well, think again, mister! I'm going to do this when I'm good and ready, see? So you tell that penis fellow to come back and visit soon and maybe, just maybe, I'll do what you need me to do. IF you say please. And maybe by me something sparkly."
Patience grasshopper.
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